Don’t be a terrible dinner guest when social media invites you over
There’s a lot that needs to be done before successfully executing a strategic plan to accomplish your business goals—I know this and I feel for anyone tasked with this job. And social media, being the new kid on the communication channel block, all too often is the hardest to crack, like a misunderstood teenager.
But flip the analogy, and it’s not so hard to see what will work and what won’t, every time. I feel so strongly about this that I will even claim that if you think about yourself, the credit union brand, as the guest at a dinner party, and your followers as the hosts, you will soon understand exactly how to use social channels in the most successful way of all the channels in your plan.
Instead of thinking about what you, the brand, want to say to your ‘hapless’ followers, think of your followers as your gracious hosts to an exciting dinner party where you’re new in town and are eager to meet and connect with the other guests attending.
Would you walk into a social gathering loudly shouting about yourself and your virtues, offering advice and ideas to those already engaged in conversation with each other without introducing yourself at an appropriate time and listening to the conversations being had? Of course not! Talking only about yourself or only pandering to others around you gets people at a dinner to stop taking to you and mosey on. It’s no different in social media.
Studies show people love to talk about themselves–and social media is the petri dish for it. Let them—but as a brand, do not join in the noise. Instead, listen to their needs, listen for the signal. If your ‘hosts’ are talking about themselves, and again, chances are good on social media they are, you will learn what challenges they have if you’re listening. That knowledge is invaluable. Because after listening and understanding their challenges, when you start talking, dinner party scene or social media channel, a guest with relevant stories and useful information is always welcome in the conversation. (Here’s a great interview with the former head of the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Program about interpersonal relations and how to get people to like you.)
You also don’t want to be the guest that has nothing to say and always causes that awkward break in conversation by walking up and saying nothing. We all know that person. Let’s not be him.
So in summary –three social (media) party fouls we should never commit:
Mistake 1: Shouting awkward facts about one’s self at inappropriate times like a child that hasn’t learned proper social etiquette. (Ex: I’m XYZ Credit Union and I’m 40 years old today!)
Mistake 2: Irrelevant content not matched to fellow dinner party attendees’ conversations (Ex: Mentioning CD rates to a group largely concerned with having enough money to pay next month’s rent or mortgage.)
Mistake 3: Showing up because you want to be at the party but having nothing at all to say once there. (Ex: standing in the corner and waiting for people to come talk to you.)
So how, you may be thinking, do you avoid these mistakes and be the life of the social media party? Of course there are thousands of how-to articles out there on topics like how to maximize your SEO and how to set your social media marketing strategy, and there’s nothing wrong with learning that stuff too, but I’m not talking social media shop here right now. I want to share a few essential elements that are oft left off the aforementioned ‘how to’ lists. I can’t stress enough how important these basic socials skill are in the real social world and the social media world.
To be a better party guest/social media user:
- Listen
- Be humble
- Don’t talk about yourself too much but don’t be too vague when asked questions
- Understand others’ struggles and challenges and provide relevant stories/information
- Partake in fun and joyful conversations in a real, non-pandering way
- Don’t pretend to be something you’re not but put your best self forward
- Be human, be vulnerable and make others feel comfortable being around you
- Look for genuine shared interests to connect in real ways where and when applicable
- Add to it, but don’t force it –the conversation or connection
- Move around and talk to and meet as many people as possible
Following these rules of social engagement, you’ll make some real genuine connections in social media, too. The plan doesn’t always have to come from a conference room strategic planning session. Sometimes it’s best to sharpen your best dinner party skills and go be social for a while.
